(This was a the question asked to me by a dear friend and, this was my reply… )
Firstly, I think I need to analyze my life at current. I’m not content. I’m a sinner.
I don’t fear dying.. I fear that of which I have lived.
But mostly I fear what I have done for this world is nothing... I have nothing to show for.
When I die I won’t be asked how many friends I had but, how many people was I a friend to?
I’ve had 21 years… but I doubt I could vouch for 21 minutes of goodness.
Allah knows best.
I may have done the usual good in this way or that way…But purity is beyond that. Entirety is a prerequisite. Entirety.. It requires my entire being to be righteous and good.
It’s like I’ve lived my life like a supermarket Muslim.. I’ve walked from day to day like from shelf to shelf.. Picking up what I want.. And ignoring the rest.
And that’s sad.
Sad because I have so much at my disposal.. Been short of nothing.. But fall into the traps of this world.
Life is beautiful.. But it’s beauty can only be seen by the right decisions you make.. And these decisions tend to define oneself.
I fear my decisions were wrong.
I pray for guidance.
But at the crossroads of every decision I’ve taken the wrong turn.
The fact that a crossroad existed means I had been guided.
But I failed the test…
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9 comments:
i used to fear death...but i dont know whether it was due to a couple of my friends passing away or just growing up, that made me come to terms with it...
sometimes its unbelievable to think 'one day, i wont be here anymore'...but one day, all this wont mean anything, except the kind of person you were.
anyway, i have soooo many thoughts on the issue, but if i dont get to class, i'll die before my time.
have a great day!
true
so sorry muktar il try to link u as soon as i learn how...:)
good post nonetheless
hey.. 1st time im reading your blog and the first post i read is about death. oddly enough, i was talking about this with my friends just this morning.
i think im more scared of being hurt or mugged or stabbed than actually dying. after all, its hardest for those left behind. i know about whats supposed to happen in the kabar n stuff but i still see death as blackness, escaping from this world. and maybe im manic depressive, and in desperate ned of prozac, but it doesnt sound all that bad..
yeah death. its strange concept. when i was young i almost wished for death, life offered so little at that time (long story).
i figured best die young no worries in after life. as i grew older things changed. Don't be so harsh on ureself. every breath offers u a new chance...poem below
Dawns another blue day, think'st will thou spend it uselessly away
Its so true that our lives teach us who we are, n yet that lesson is learnt only after we needed the knowledge to fix the things that require unfixing.
If that makes any sense. I just hope i learn the lessons I need to before passing on..Insha-Allah... Very thought Provoking Mak... Deep down we all know this yet none of us brave enough to admit it like you have ....
With that yes Allah knows best ... :)
Its so true that our lives teach us who we are, n yet that lesson is learnt only after we needed the knowledge to fix the things that require unfixing.
If that makes any sense. I just hope i learn the lessons I need to before passing on..Insha-Allah... Very thought Provoking Mak... Deep down we all know this yet none of us brave enough to admit it like you have ....
With that yes Allah knows best ... :)
Subhanallah!ur awareness is enlightenin.u say uv chosen the wrong paths previously-just one right turn wil take u 2 ur destinatn.iv been thinkin of death often lately too-n of bloggin it.i wan2 die young,so that i may be preventd frm sin.but i also wan2 die old so i may worship more.theres a dua which answers q 'o rabb!if life is better 4me than let me live n if death is better,than take me away'
My Dearest,
How can we fear that which is inevitable?
Yes, i know, we've debated this when i asked you about it, but, Our Lord is oft Forgiving,Most Merciful. Don't sell yourself short, after all, it takes a vision to light up paths to greatness. And i know that you're a good person with a sincere heart :)
We pilot our own destinies after all, Life, purpose, meaning. Death after all is merely another path in the journey, perhaps the final path. The birth of eternal existance.
I know we'll probably have a similar debate again, after all, this is a means to measure change ;)
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